Izzy: Greetings all you Elsas and Judes!
Elsa: Wow! I made an appearance in your greeting. I’m just so honored.
Izzy: Are you?
Elsa: Nope.
Izzy: Well, you should be.
Jude: I am.
Izzy: Thank you. At least someone has manners and good taste.
Jude: That would be ME!
Elsa: Oh, yes, of course… Coming from the guy who eats cardboard and the woman who cusses like Samuel L. Jackson.
Izzy: A DRUNKEN Samuel L. Jackson….
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Izzy: Now here is a bitch that knows how to exercise. A designer jogger with a Chanel bag. Snap and Snap!
Elsa: I admire someone who can look stylish and beautiful, even while working-out or running errands.
Jude: You should see Elsa when she tries to walk the stairs. She wheezes like a vacuum cleaner.
Izzy: Maybe if we dangled a Chanel purse in front of her face it might inspire her to run after it.
Elsa: I don’t see any rock-solid abs on either of you.
Izzy: It’s the Rona. I haven’t been able to go to the gym as often.
Elsa: You could exercise at home, you know.
Izzy: I do believe that Celine here is onto something that just might inspire both of us to get active.
Elsa: And that is?
Izzy: You know those little bottles of liquor? You could put at least five of them in that purse. And while you’re running after the Chanel bag… I will be running after the liquor.
Jude: And if I am the one holding the bag, you’ll both be screwed because your fat hind-ends will never catch me.
Izzy: I say we tie him up now.
Elsa: Maybe we should comment on the outfit.
Izzy: I love it.
Elsa: I love the bold contrast of black and white with the pop of pink. And of course, the Chanel bag.
Izzy: Of course.
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Elsa: This one here doesn’t appear to have any issues with staying fit. Look at those long, slender legs.
Izzy: We could be twins.
Jude: You and Iggy?
Izzy: Yes! Our names are similar.
Elsa: And that is where the similarities end.
Izzy: We both have long slender legs.
Elsa: Um..
Izzy: And long graceful necks.
Jude: Um…
Izzy: And we both know how to show-off our bods.
Elsa: Okay, then.
Jude: So…
Elsa: So… Anyway, let’s focus on this amazing metallic rain coat.
Jude: Perfect for when it’s raining cats and dogs.
Izzy: …
Elsa: …
Jude: What? It’s okay for you two to make stupid jokes?
Izzy: Correction. We do not make “stupid” jokes, we make well-placed and HILARIOUS jokes. Or at least I do.
Elsa: So, this rain coat is perfect for a rainy day. It’s a fabulous color and fabric and the design allows for easy movement.
Izzy: And ventilation.
Izzy: That’s badass street-wear right there.
Jude: Doug is livin’ his best “pug” life…
Izzy: Just stop with the puns.
Jude: Would you rather I do rhymes, because I can do those all the times?
Elsa: Here’s a novel idea. How about if we talk about FASHION on this FASHION show?
Izzy: Nahhhh…
Elsa: Okay, I’ll start. Doug looks incredibly handsome in his stripped shirt. There is something so classic about this style and pattern. He looks modern and classic.
Izzy: And badass.
Elsa: I think we already established that. But what is most interesting about this look is the fact that he offsets this the classic top with some fun colored accessories.
Izzy: Why don’t my shoes say, “Izzy” on them? I don’t feel like this is terribly fair.
Jude: Life’s not fair, kid. Like for instance, there was this time when I was making INCREDIBLY funny and intelligent puns and rhymes, and they went totally unappreciated. Life’s not fair…
Izzy: Is that me?
Elsa: I’m going to go with a … no.
Izzy: You just never know when you’ve been drinking a bit and you have a lamp shade on on your head, you can’t be sure where the paparazzi is located.
Elsa: I’m sure that’s a common problem for you.
Izzy: Oh, for sure!
Jude: And the lampshade makes for the perfect disguise.
Elsa: Well, which do you think Wore it Best?
Izzy: TIE!
Elsa: Actually, we do agree on this one. Both of these looks are interesting, colorful and well made.
Izzy: PLUS, with the reflective quality on the bodice, you will never be without a disco ball.
Elsa: Which is another common problem…
Jude: I KNOW! You don’t know how many times I’ve walked out the door without my disco ball.
Elsa: Well, this outfit would solve that problem, for sure. But I also appreciate it for it’s uniqueness and the bold statement it makes.
Izzy: I’m about to make a unique and bold statement.
Jude: You want to drink?
Izzy: Okay, so it’s not so unique.
Elsa: But it is a good idea!
Izzy and Elsa: Stay fabulous, Fashionistas!
