Pawshion Police

The best and worst in canine fashion.

Boos and Eeeks!

Izzy: Greetings all you Boos and Eeeks!
Elsa: For, what I believe is the first time in the history of our show, I love your greeting.
Izzy: WHaa??? First time.
Elsa: Typically they are sexually based or at the very least, wildly offensive to half of our audience.
Izzy: More than half, I’d say… maybe closer to 70%?
Elsa: And the fact that today’s greeting is, at least, somewhat related to something… well, it’s refreshing.
Izzy: So, you’re assuming that this is going to be a Halloween show.
Elsa: Well, yes.
Izzy: For once in your life, you’re right.

Jude: What did I miss?
Izzy: ARrrgghhhhh, you’re late…. Yer going to have to walk the plank!
Elsa: This is one sophisticated pirate. And that glare in his eyes…. piercing and kind of sexy.
Izzy: Look at you, Elsa… liking the bad boys.
Jude: I think Elsa makes a very good wench.
Izzy: I was thinking she was more like a Yo-ho-ho.
Elsa: That is enough, besides, I think that would more likely be your name, Izzy.
Izzy: And I’d wear it proudly.
Elsa: Can we just get back to discussing fashion?
Izzy: Alright you, scallywag, let’s discuss. I love the contrast of the black and gold. It’s super dramatic.
Elsa: I love that too. I love all the details in gold and the texture of the feathers, you scurvy dog.
Izzy: Oh, haven’t you heard? That is all cleared-up. No more scurvy.
Elsa: That’s… comforting.
Jude: Do I want to ask?

 

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Izzy: Dearly beloved… We are gathered here today to get through this called life….
Jude: I thought we were here for a fashion show?
Elsa: Oh, Jude. Your youth is showing.
Jude: Your youth ain’t shown for a looooong time.
Izzy: No, see a better come-back would have been “Act your age, not your shoe size.”
Jude: Huh?
Elsa: I think this is a rather useless effort, Izzy.
Izzy: This is an important life skill. When being offensive, it’s far funnier if you can reference something in the conversation. Like, in this instance, the lyrics from a Prince song since we are looking at a Prince costume.  You’ll learn.
Jude: Ohhh… that’s Prince — like that old singer.
Izzy: WHA???  Don’t disrespect Prince. Even I, the Queen will bow to the Prince.
Elsa: Again, should we discuss the fashion?
Izzy: As far as emulating Prince, this is spot-on!
Elsa: I know, isn’t it great?  Even down to the tousled hair and the clothing. It’s a perfect costume and tribute.
Izzy: Hey Elsa, here’s another Prince lyric that totally applies to you,” A body like yours oughta be in jail ’cause it’s HORRIBLE.”
Elsa: I don’t think that’s exactly how the song goes…

 

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Izzy: This would scare the SCURVY DOG out of anyone!
Jude: I don’t like balloons any more.
Elsa: But the costume is great, don’t you think? Well done. A good representation of Pennywise.
Izzy: Pennywise? I thought that was an Elsa costume.  You know… with your bad make-up skills and that hair looks just like you.
Elsa: You’re just so very funny.
Jude: I want to go back to that purple guy!!
Elsa: But look at that face…nothing but pure cuteness. I like this interpretation. A scary costume turns cute in the right hands.

 

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Jude: Well, crap! It’s more scary stuff!!
Elsa: You’re not allowed to use that word, Jude.
Jude: Okay — let me change it! Oh, ELSA! It’s more scary stuff!
Izzy: Crap and Elsa are always synonymous in my mind too.
Elsa: I’m not sure what makes me want to “scream” more — this mask or being stuck with you two.
Izzy: Is that your attempt to reference the title of the movie, “Scream” and be clever?
Elsa: Maybe.
Izzy: Ah.
Jude. I am so scared.
Izzy: I’d think you’d be used to looking at hideous and scary things — I mean, you do LIVE with Elsa.
Elsa: This dog is adorably scary though, don’t you think?

 

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Izzy: So, this wins the Internet!
Elsa: I do LOVE this look. Both looks, really.
Jude: Their lucky kids. They can have cupcakes and milk at the same time.
Elsa: Um.
Izzy: Um.
Jude: Well…
Izzy: Even I am not sure what to say.
Elsa: Izzy is speechless??  I wonder if we could use this “Who Wore it Best?” for every show.
Izzy: Okay, I thought of something to say.
Elsa: DANG!
Izzy: Do you think that these are real or implants?
Jude: Natural.
Elsa: The cupcakes are quite likely … implants.
Izzy: It would be so handy to have cupcake boobs, I mean… you’d never get hungry.
Elsa: So, which look do we like best?
Izzy: That is a straight-up a tie. Katy’s boobs are great and so are the furry friend’s boobs.
Elsa: Again, we aren’t rating boobs.
Izzy: Oh, that’s right — that’s my other show.
Elsa: Well, I love both outfits. Katy because she was the originator and is colorful and spunky and our canine friend because…I think it still brings the spirit of Katy’s outfit but with a unique spin.
Izzy: And how handy would it be if your boobs produced cupcakes… never have to wonder what to bring to the company picnic.
Jude: I bet you’d get fat.
Izzy: Maybe that’s Elsa’s problem. Elsa, do your boobs produce cupcakes?
Elsa: Time to end the show.

Izzy and Elsa: Stay fabulous, Fashionistas!
Jude: And Happy Halloween!