Izzy: Greetings all you Pinky’s and Brains!
Elsa: Does everyone fall into one of those categories?
Izzy: Well, take us for example. You LOVE pink.
Elsa: So, that makes me Pinky?
Elsa: And that makes you….
Izzy: The Brain. Obviously.
Elsa: Oh, sure. That’s really obvious. What, with all your thought provoking conversation and high class vocabulary.
Izzy: This ought to elucidate the situation to you. Your perfunctory assessment about my intelligence was a real non-sequitur since we were talking about how much you adore the light hued red. You, bitch… I
mean, you female canine.
Elsa: You smuggled a thesaurus under your dress, didn’t you?
Elsa: Did you even use those words correctly?
Izzy: Probably not. How would I know?
Elsa; You are “The Brain” after all.
Izzy: At least you finally acknowledge that fact.
Elsa: Of course.
Izzy: I’m smarter than you are.
Elsa: Of course.
Izzy: STOP THAT!
Elsa: I’m just agreeing with you.
Izzy: Not in a good way though!!
Elsa: You know I love you. And you know I do love this new place of ours! Our new home at www.pawshionpolice.com is pretty swanky, don’t you think???
Izzy: It’s posh and luxurious and amazing… just like us.
Elsa: At least you said “us” and not “me.”
Izzy: All kidding aside, I think you’re pretty amazeballs ….
Elsa: Did you give me that compliment as a quid pro quo for my kind words to you?
Izzy: First, what?? And second, what??
Elsa: Let’s just look at our first look. Here’s your thesaurus back.
Elsa: Popeye looks sophisticated and chic and ready for a day at the park.
Izzy: You can look swank and not skank, even when romping in the grass or having a picnic.
Elsa: And here’s proof of that. I love this dark denim. It’s sharp and crisp and starched. It has clean lines and fits very nicely.
Izzy: And the scarf and bling that is a bit off center is nice.
Elsa: Yes, it’s so playful. Playful, but sophisticated.
Izzy: Playful and sophisticated don’t always go hand-in-hand. In fact, it takes a skilled eye…
Elsa: Or us.
Izzy: We’re skilled.
Elsa: Continue what you were saying…
Izzy: It takes a skilled eye to pull off both playful and sophisticated.
Elsa: True. Sometimes playful can look immature or sloppy.
Izzy: And sophisticated can come across as stuffy and as boring as you, Elsa.
Elsa: Why are you attacking me today?
Izzy: Today? The reason? The same reason I did it yesterday and will do it tomorrow. It’s fun. I mean, it bestows upon me an enormous amount of enlightened pleasure.
Elsa: I suppose we should get back to the fashion since this is a fashion show and not the “How Stupid Can Izzy Look” show.
Izzy: Oh, snap. You’re feisty today. Fine… moving on.
Elsa: I LOVE a dog in a fur coat.
Izzy: We all wear fur coats.
Elsa: You know what I mean.
Izzy: Unless you’re like one of those hair-less cats…
Elsa: Just stop!!! Look at the pretty doggy…
Izzy: That is pretty nice. I do love this jacket. But you know what makes it work?? Dani’s long legs really make this look elegant.
Elsa: Exactly, the bulkiness of the fur coat works because of her tall and slender frame.
Izzy: Right, if you wore that, you’d look like a Wookie.
Elsa: You’re mean!
Izzy: Well, am I right? You’re shorter… you’re not…slender-er.
Elsa: So much for sounding intelligent.
Izzy: I’m just saying that you have to dress for your body type. And this isn’t your body type.
Elsa: Moving along…
Elsa: Oh, Chewie is adorable!
Izzy: We were just talking about you, Chewie!
Elsa: We were?
Izzy: Wookies. Chewbacca.
Elsa: Well, Chewie doesn’t really resemble Chewbacca at all…
Izzy: What do you think about this denim?
Elsa: It’s different than the first look, but it works! It’s casual, but doesn’t look sloppy.
Izzy: I think it is more casual than the first look.
Elsa: It is. Lighter denim tends to look more casual but this does not look the least bit sloppy.
Izzy: I like the floral top too. Florals are sorta hot right now.
Elsa: Speaking of hot…. our next guest won’t be getting hot this summer.
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Izzy: Oh, my goodness! He has ass-conditioning!
Izzy: Air conditioning for your ass! I want those overalls.
Elsa: You want them?
Izzy: Utilitarian purposes only!
Izzy: Think about it. It’s a hot and sticky summer day… now, your butt can either be confined to some traditional pants or you could be wearing the new Ass-Conditioning Overalls! Not available in stores.
Elsa: Are you the new spokes model for this innovative product?
Izzy: No, but I should be!!!!
Elsa: These certainly would make using the Little Doggies’ room less complicated.
Izzy: Right.. you can just pee whenever… where ever…
Elsa: Not sure of the where ever part… The bottomless pants don’t give you permission to urinate where ever you want.
Izzy: No, but it does make it possible!!!
Elsa: You’re sold on these pants, aren’t you?
Izzy: Fashion be damned!! I need these pants.
Elsa: I do hope you know that you will be walking alone in these crotchless pants…. I will not participate.
Izzy: Listen, honey, when a girl wears crotchless pants, she is not lacking in friends or followers.
Elsa: What a classy end to our show today.
Izzy: You mean a class CROTCHLESS end to our show today.
Elsa: Ya. That’s exactly what I meant.
Izzy: Remain remarkable, fashionistas.
Elsa: Really, Izzy? Give me that thesaurus.