Izzy: Greetings all you Snobs and Knobs!
Elsa: You’re being a little offensive… again.
Izzy: Just a little? I must be losing my touch.
Elsa:I don’t know anyone who would want to be a snob or a knob.
Izzy: You say them like they’re bad things.
Elsa: Well… calling someone a snob isn’t necessarily a compliment. And I’m sure calling them a knob isn’t either.
Izzy: Embrace your inner snob, Elsa. And knobs are…well, okay, that part wasn’t nice.
Elsa: You like being a little mean, don’t you.
Izzy: It’s funicular!
Elsa: Are you using words you don’t know again?
Izzy. No, I’m making-up words you don’t know.
Elsa: A know what a funicular is…
Izzy: Funicular, from the Greek word icular…
Elsa: Oh, this should be fun.
Izzy: Don’t you mean… funicular???
Izzy: As I was saying…… It is from the Greek word…”icular” It’s an adjective meaning amusing, entertaining, or enjoyable. For example: “It was a funicular evening”
Elsa: Your definitions are pretty funicular.
Izzy: Right.. you’re using that correctly in the sentence.
Elsa: So, you know there is ANOTHER definition of a funicular? A real one.
Izzy: The one I just said?
Elsa: No, stupid!! A funicular is a railroad car that goes up the side of a mountain. Kind of like a ski lift.
Izzy: I like mine better.
Elsa: Before you get all hot and bothered…
Izzy: Or funiculared.
Elsa: This handsome man is already taken. So don’t get ideas of putting your grubby paws on him.
Izzy: These paws are not grubby!!! They are well-manicured and maintained, thankyouverymuch.
Elsa: Then keep your manicured paws off of him.
Izzy: Look but don’t touch?
Elsa: Words you should have tattooed on your arms so you are reminded of them daily.
Izzy: Or I could just have your ugly face tattooed on my arms and no one would let me touch them. Is that his tongue or a rose petal?
Elsa: Hid tongue! Why would he have a rose petal sticking out of his mouth?
Izzy: Well, he’s hungry… they’re accessible.
Elsa: Just because something is within arm’s reach doesn’t mean you should snack on it.
Izzy: Does it though??
Elsa: What do you think of his outfit?
Elsa: I said the outfit. Not the tongue. Not the liquor.
Izzy: I can’t see him. I can’t touch him so therefore I must not look at him.
Elsa: Are you THAT weak kneed?
Elsa: Okay, then I will discuss this lovely outfit all by myself.
Izzy: That sound funicularious! Informal adjective related to funicular from the Greek word….
Elsa: Just be quiet and let the grown-ups talk.
Izzy: When I see one, I will.
Elsa: I love the color of the tie and how it matches the sweater so beautifully. But what makes the tie even more special is the material it is made out of… leather.
Izzy: Faux leather, I presume…. Since we don’t eat friends.
Elsa: You’re going to eat his bow tie?
Izzy: If he can eat roses….. I can eat ties.
Izzy: Dis girl’s got it going on!!!!
Elsa: She looks amazing. Attitude plus attitude equals Aggie!
Izzy: I love the faux leather vest and that awesome fringed skirt. But remember… if you are going to wear a fringed leather skirt, wear underpants before you go for a motorcycle. Just a little helpful tip for you.
Elsa: Sound, yet strange, advise.
Izzy: Well, it’s true….
Elsa: I love how the skirt has movement, even though it’s made from a stiff material like leather. It’s just so interesting. And of course, the accessory in her hair makes an otherwise “tough” looking outfit suddenly become feminine.
Izzy; She’s too cute to be tough! It’s like if Elmo wore a leather jacket and got tats.
Elsa: Maybe not “tough” in that sense, but she certainly represents strong women here. No one will take advantage of her.
Izzy: She’d kick their butt and not break a nail
Elsa: Ohhhh, la la!!
Izzy: How do you say “fierce bitch” in French?
Elsa: Chienne française… Wait… why am encouraging you?
Izzy: Because I’ve brainwashed you.
Izzy: I said, because you’re beautiful!
Elsa: Thank you? And so is Tinkle!
Izzy: The beret is DA bomb!
Elsa: Isn’t it though? The texture and the bling are perfect. And it’s the perfect scale for her teeny tiny body.
Izzy: And the French theme continues throughout the outfit.
Elsa: Nice job, Tinkle!
Elsa: Now I know how she got her name…. Ohhhh Mabel, you look terrific!!
Izzy: So how did Cardi B get her name? I bet the B stands for “Bitch” as in, She’s one hot bitch.”
Elsa: There are other words that start with the letter “B” you know?
Izzy: But none so wonderful as bitch.
Elsa: Or maybe it could stand for her REAL first name which is Belcalis.
Izzy: Probably not.
Elsa: ANYWAY.. let’s look this over. Which One Wore it Best?
Izzy: They both wore it best.
Elsa: MMmm… not possible. Do you know what “best” means?
Izzy: I know what “bitch” means…I opened a dictionary just the other day and there was your picture…
Elsa: They both look so lovely and so polished.
Izzy: Okay, I’ll start. Props to Cardi B for pioneering this crazy amazing look.
Elsa: Yes, she looks elegant and sophisticated but still a little whacky and unpredictable.
Izzy: Whacky? You’re so old. Anyway, yes, she looks fab-u-lous! But so does Mabel.
Elsa: Yes, she sure does!! They both look like Thumbelina to me. A little bitty fairy living in the center of a flower.
Izzy: Okay. I’m going with Mabel on this one. For two reasons.
Elsa: Which are?
Izzy: Which are…what?
Elsa: That’s what I’m asking you… what are your two reasons?
Izzy: Because I want to and because I want to.
Elsa: Very scientific of you. Well, I will go with Mabel too and I have to two actual reasons for it…
Izzy: And they are….
Elsa: I like the proportion of Mabel’s hat and how it’s placed. Cardi B’s hat seems a little too small and doesn’t seem to rest on top of her head perfectly.
Izzy: And two?
Elsa: Personal preference here… but I like that Mabel’s flower doesn’t seem to be attached and there is just one. I think that Cardi B’s outfit would look cleaner if there weren’t the two flowers in front.
Izzy: And they both look funiculuar!
Izzy and Elsa: Stay fabulous, Fashionistas!