Izzy: Greetings all you Tulips and Pansies.
Elsa: What a lovely greeting! I love flowers and it’s so nice of you
to open the show with a lovely word picture.
Izzy: Umm….. sure.
Elsa: Well, isn’t it?
Izzy: If you’re thinking flowers, I guess.
Elsa: What were you thinking if you weren’t thinking of flowers?
Izzy: Just what I said. Good looking men to kiss and those with no back bone.
Elsa: What in the world…???
Izzy: Tulips… as in “two lips to kiss.”
Izzy: Pansies… as in YOU.
Elsa: Sometimes I’m afraid of how your mind thinks.
Izzy: You’re just jealous because you don’t think like me.
Elsa: No. I’m afraid because you think like you think AND you know where I live.
Izzy: Don’t forget that I also know your phone number, passwords, and
social security number.
Elsa: I know… wait, you do?
Izzy: I do, what? I didn’t say anything.
Elsa: And… now I REALLY am scared.
Izzy: Let me distract you with this.
Elsa: Just because you throw a beautiful Frenchie in PINK with FLOWERS
doesn’t mean that I’ve forgotten.
Elsa: Temporarily. Only because I want to focus on this incredible
look. I love the color, obviously.
Izzy: Do you like pink?
Elsa: Ha! And flowers! Put those together and I’m in pink flower
Heaven. AND look at the tulle! I might fall over dead.
Izzy: Don’t worry if you do. Remember, I know your passwords and I
will be happy to do a few bank transfers. To fulfill your final
wishes, of course.
Elsa: Of course.
Izzy: I do love the floral wreath around the neck. That’s pretty HAWT!
Elsa: Doesn’t get much more feminine than this!
Izzy: And it doesn’t get any more masculine than that!!
Elsa: You know I can’t resist pink and I know you can’t resist men.
Izzy: Some men I can resist… but this one… no! The badass hair,
awesome taste in eye-wear and LOOK at those abs!!!!
Elsa: Look a little closer.
Izzy: Oh, trust me… I’m looking at those rippling muscles and that
Elsa: I agree that he is very manly and handsome and I also believe
that you are an idiot. That’s a muscle t-shirt, dummy.
Izzy: You should judge, Miss Spanx-and-push-up-bras.
Elsa: First of all… ewwww that you are thinking of my undergarments
and second I wasn’t judging him for wearing the shirt. I was judging
you for not knowing that this doesn’t reflect his actual physique.
Izzy: I know what you are, but what am I?
Elsa: Childish. Vindictive. Ignorant. Should I go on?
Izzy: I’m better than I thought.
Elsa: I forgot arrogant and self-absorbed.
Izzy: I’m not self-absorbed….
Elsa: Yes. Yes, you are.
Izzy: I’m self-aware. I’m self-amazing. I’m self-fantastic.
Elsa: Oh, and you make-up stupid words.
Izzy: And I have lousy taste in friends, apparently.
Elsa: But this awesome Frenchie doesn’t have lousy taste in anything.
Izzy: Now it’s time for you to look closer. That’s purple and those
aren’t REAL flowers. They’re printed on a t-shirt. Stupid.
Elsa: I didn’t say that they were real flowers.
Izzy: You’re still stupid.
Elsa: I’m smart enough to appreciate this beautiful outfit and expert
use of accessory.
Izzy: But are you smart enough to choose the CORRECT winner of the Who
Wore it Best? segment?
Izzy: This has to be the best “Who Wore it Best?” we have ever featured.
Elsa: You’re shameless.
Elsa: I can see we can’t let you choose our looks any more.
Elsa: I do believe you have featured yourself a few times now…
Izzy: When yous gots its, flaunts its.
Elsa:You do look lovely. I love this look on Kim though. It’s rather
amazing don’t you think. And talk about a floral print…
Izzy: Again. You’re stupid. Look closer.
Elsa: That was a joke!
Izzy: You’re a joke.
Elsa: I do think you both look lovely.
Izzy: But I look lovlierest.
Izzy: Well, sure.
Elsa: I do love how you have the flowers closer to your face than Kim
has. At least you had the sense to cover your chubby neck.
Izzy: If it were on you, you would have to wear the flowers on your
face to cover that ugly mug.
Elsa: No reason to get nasty. I just mean that Kim accentuated her
lovely shoulders and chest, which is a beautiful feature. And you also
made a good decision. And that is to camouflage one of your least
Izzy: One of??? How long is your list?
Elsa: Well, I mean, you must know that your rear is rather flabby.
Izzy: Now you’re just being mean.
Elsa: In all honesty, I love you both, but I will give you the win
because you are my friend. We are friends, right?
Izzy: After today, I’m not so sure.
Elsa: I love to tease you and I love to take you out to drinks… so
how about we get out of here?
Izzy and Elsa: Stay fabulous, fashionistas!